October 10, 2007

• Tomorrow – or I guess later on today since it’s past midnight now, I will be attempting to remove myself from this hell that He chains me in.
  When I got home earlier, he started yelling at me, reeking of alcohol and stinking of indignant rage. I don’t know how many times in how many ways I can say “I’m leaving you.” but it’s gotten so I sound like a broken record. I know what he’s trying to do, too – talk me out of it, promises me that he’ll change, but I don’t think that in the drunken haze he understands that each sentence he literally spits in my face feeds the disgust that has overtaken what love and affection I once had for him.

  Now add to that the fear that he’ll hurt me or do something incredibly stupid and it makes me recant the tentative assurance Id given him that I would help him for the next couple of months.

  How significant is it when I tell you, then, that
  He will not let me leave.

  • 4:02 am
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